I never really understood what God ment by this until this year. I mean I’m sure I have come across people like this in my past but I was blind then and now I can see. Now this is a very challenging lesson! I am going to be very transparent with you it’s gut reaching!

I unfortunately have people in my life who want to hurt me and I don’t understand why? I really stopped asking because I finally realized that I’m not supposed to know. If it was God’s plan for me to know he would have made it known in some way. So, when I finally stopped being so stubborn and started listening to God! Life is starting to make sense.

I am being challenged at work in ways I never thought possible. I have run my department for 3 years now. When I learn my job I learn it to the fullest and then some. The lady I work for this year is very scatter brained, disorganized, and just doesn’t have a leadership quality in her. She is disrespectful to staff, she can’t deal with confrontation, she doesn’t build relationships, and she can’t care enough to even get to know her own staff!!

Now for those of us few…now I mean few!! We know her on a personal level and she is such a beautiful, warm hearted, loving mother, wife, friend, baker, homemaker, and kind person you will ever meet. Now I have had the pleasure to see this beautiful side of this woman and this is why I fight to have this relationship with her.

Now her previous school was so terrible to her that I think it traumatized her. Now it’s effecting her in her current position and I need to find a way to council her through it! Light bulb! I have an idea!!! I will bring in some help to coach her to be a better leader for next year!

This lady was telling my bosses that I was never at work. I wasn’t doing my job. Lord knows what else? I have never been called into the bosses office so much in one year! I was so stressed out I couldn’t understand what I was doing wrong. I only took 7 personal days this year. The rest I used for coaching. This hit me sideways. I never expected this to happen, I had never had a boss complain about my work ethic. This truly hurt me like cracked the heart hurt. I thought this woman was my friend. I thought we were a team to help one another not to blame me for her not doing her job.

I have a talent of making my facilitators looking good and then they leave and get better jobs. I told myself that I wasn’t going to do that this year. Especially because I had a woman who I thought knew her job and was confident to do it. I guess I was wrong. I just wish she would have communicated with me and just told me it was all too much. I would have helped. I’m not a mean person unless you do what she did to me. Then I loose disrespect for you and it’s hard to gain that back.

I have no choice but to work with my friend next year so I’m hopeful that I can rebuild the trust in her and give her some tools to regain some of her confidence back. I think she can be truly wonderful if she just lets her guard down and keeps an open mind.