I have chosen to take Baby Steps…. hoping that this time the changes I make become ingrained habits because I feel and see the results of them prior to initiating further changes and steps. The First Step and most difficult hurdle to overcome was me, myself and my mind-set. I had to get beyond the vicious cycle I was circling and break free to take the first Step of this journey.
I have to say it took me months. Months until I admitted there was a problem that needed fixing. Then Months to get the energy to decide to do something about it. Then, when I knew I needed to DO Something, Anything to make a change so I could just Feel Good again, the best version of me…… It took sooooo much energy to pick up my foot. And. Step.
So First Step Accomplished: Act on the Decision to do something.
Now I think it’s fairly obvious my major issue is my mind and emotions. I’m a certified Health Coach, I know how to help others. I believe in holistic health…. mind, body and spirit.. treating one without the other truly doesn’t work. I knew I could make all the positive changes to my diet, exercise and faith regimen, but it wouldn’t stick if I didn’t truly change how I react to my negative thoughts and change how my emotions control my actions. So, my Second Step: a Christian Counselor.
A Christian Counselor is just my personal preference. I needed an objective, trained counselor that could help me exam why I was a yo-yo. Sounds crazy, but why did I lose, gain, lose, gain, exercise, slug out, exercise.???… I was either obsessed with eating and exercising correctly OR obsessed with eating and couch-potatoing. My faith was either blazing or it was a water-doused speck. I’m truly not trying to make light of it, but I’m an emotional eater, I have addictive behaviors and definitely don’t speak to myself the way I would speak to my own daughters. It took maybe 4 sessions before we actually started getting to the grit of why I act and behave like I do…and to be honest it royally ticked me off. (Not the word I wanted to use, mind you.) My counselor says it’s a good place to be, that anger is the emotion that’s going to drive the impetus to change.
So… the second step is completed…. just have a feeling this second baby step is actually going to be made up of thousands of minuscule steps… But that’s okay because interestingly enough she has encouraged my writing and feels that this will actually be very healing for me… and Ironically – that’s my third Step: Writing
Writing?! Why is this even considered a step? Well for me…. I believe it’s two-fold. There is accountability in maintaining this blog. I have given myself a responsibility to maintain this site and continue to update or write new blogs. The purpose of which is to document my current mind, body and spirit journey to well-being. But the other reason, which is much more personal is to get out everything I think and feel…. and for me, when I get too negative… It’s not acceptable. I have to find the way out. It’s almost like counseling myself. My counselor says I’m actually going to save myself money, because for me this seems to work so well. So I write these articles to encourage myself and I write poems… because for some unknown reason I am currently in the process of writing a second one. Don’t ask me… I’m just going with it. All I know… it is helping me focus, see what my heart truly feels, where my negativity reigns and maintain consistency, which is always key for my personal success.
Fourth Step: Time with God.
This is for my spirit… my faith, my hope which I need. I attempt to spend time with a devotional in the morning and pray. It’s my time to get my head and heart right for the day. To lay my fears or concerns on God regarding myself and other. This works for me. He lays bible verses on my mind and honestly they are so appropriate for my needs and the reason I feel better. When I take this time whether it be 5 minutes or 20 minutes… it feels Good and Right and then I feel Good and Right. Like I can accomplish what I want this day.
Fourth Step: Daily Time with God to Start my Day – Imperative.
Fifth Step and Sixth Step: Smoothies and Meal Planning ( to be honest, I didn’t realize I had made so many baby steps). But being honest, these are small steps and I’m not consistent with them. They are my small, little token steps to the need to make dietary changes. I am allergic to wheat, buckwheat and bananas, so I know I need to eat a gluten-free diet. I know I feel much better when I don’t eat processed foods, but to be honest, I’m a carbaholic… so it’s a huge challenge. Give me a fresh loaf of bread… I give you an empty plate. Give me salty crunchy snacks, I give you kisses. Joking aside.. I am supplementing a meal… usually lunch with fresh smoothies I make myself and I meal plan. This is inconsistent and I don’t always stick to what I planned… so definitely a work in progress. But I truly plan out my meals and buy groceries according to that. The meals are healthy meals, without gluten, focused on fresh vegetables and protein. I do try to buy without added hormones, antibiotics, chemicals.. etc. I have found a beautiful farmers market this past weekend that I’m excited to visit routinely … but that’s another post for another day. 🙂
So these are the initial baby steps of my Journey. I am focusing on being consistent, working hard to be successful with each of them and I’m taking the time to ensure that they truly make me feel good before I take any new steps. Realistically, I’ve been doing these steps for about 5 weeks now. It’s not just the small step itself that’s important, but determining these are changes in my life that I will enjoy maintaining throughout the years to come. I truly want a life of health and well-being… see I’m 50 and divorced… I’m middle-aged and single … I’m looking forward to what the second half of my life is going to bring. The baby steps are Working.